If I have to move up in a building I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half.
I like women but you can't always trust them. Some of them are big liars...
Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner...
Stand-up is like a row boat: it's fun and romantic when you're choosing to do...
I tend to avoid televisions politics and places with velvet ropes.
And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning I'm looking forward to...
And of course I didn't make any money from stand up for years so I had temp...
I love women but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are...
My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes you always get another...
I think that when you get dressed in the morning sometimes you're really...
For example I was a White House intern the summer before I dropped out of...
To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a...
No country can act wisely simultaneously in every part of the globe at every...
It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em confuse 'em. It's an old...
A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney' but...
I think an artist has always to be out of step with his time.
October is a fine and dangerous season in America. a wonderful time to begin...
I do not read advertisements. I would spend all of my time wanting things.
No story is the same to us after a lapse of time or rather we who read it are...
I'm being treated like a sex object cried the lady. No matter. I will take...
You get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas from being bored. You get ideas...